... since my dad passed away.
I didn't think a year would mark the hollowness that sometimes overshadows me in small moments but it does. Just wisps of sadness that my crazy dad is not around.
I think it is only now, with a year of reflection, I realize how cool my dad really was. I mean here is his jolly face:
as he held his first grandsons.
Growing up it wasn't easy per se to have such an eccentric figure in my life. My dad was not a follower of trends, of what was cool and what was not. That was not easy for my sister and I as we navigated the shadows of school and the trials of growing up.
And it is now that I appreciate it so much more - now that he is no longer with us. Not so much in despair but that my crazy dad named Bong (but not named after a bong) filled so many lives with laughter and joy just by being who he was. Every single person who knew him said he was the happiest person they ever knew. My husband shakes his head at the stories I tell him of growing up and him being the most frugal man alive.
My dad's ashes will be at his final resting place this week. And here is the funny story that goes with it. My husband and I carefully wrapped his ashes and had them shipped to the place he will be at the request of my mom. We sent him with a guaranteed service and full tracking so I could keep an eye on him as he went his way. Wouldn't you know it they didn't meet the service guarantee so my dad got to take his 2000 mile trip for free.
I am sure my dad is smiling in heaven and giddy that he got to travel for free. It is little things like this that makes the simple pain of loss easier to bear. That and the thought that my dad is free to be his happy, jolly self in heaven.
Here's to you, daddy.